URK Preseason, 2011-2012 Edition

Welcome once again to another three months of fantasyfootball joy! The wisdom of the crowds has spoken, and congratulations to the Z’sfor winning their first URK championship! Or not; glory in the preseason often meansnothing by December. Still, it’s fun to see how everyone stacks up on paper rightnow, and we’re all forgiven for the optimism that comes from a clean slate (orpessimism that comes from a winless record, if that’s more your cup of tea). Realityarrives this week – cruel and harsh for half of us, sweet and vindictive forthe rest. There’s a long way to go and we’re just getting started! Onward tothe rankings! Oh boy!!!

12. Minions

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 9.2

Perhaps some residual voting from their slippage at the endof last season? The Minions reclaim some familiar and inglorious territory withtheir position at the bottom of the preseason poll.

The Good: Solid through most of the starter positions, withyoung, high upside talent.

The Bad: That’s a monotone bench. Shit-colored, we might even say.

The Outlook: Probably down a bit from last year, but shouldbe decent at least until injuries and bye-weeks kick in.

11. Cupcakes of DOOM!

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 8.8

This team has a pretty unique makeup, with a very riskystrategy of investing heavily in 2 or 3 offenses. Should be fascinating to seehow that plays out.

The Good: Strong QB and RB1.

The Bad: All in on the NO and PHI offenses, little depth.

The Outlook: Up and down, all season long.

10. Jehovah's Jockstrap

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 8.4

Another team that lingered at the bottom all last year andfinds itself punished in this first poll. Their starting collection of RBs is top3 in the league, at least on paper.

The Good: Strong starting RBs.

The Bad: The QB position could be disastrous.

The Outlook: If they can get passible QB play, they shouldbe okay.

9. Stars

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 7.8

Got to say, don’t see too many glaring weaknesses in thislineup right now, though the RBs could be thin if MJD goes down. That Schaub toJohnson connection should devastate a few opponents this year.

The Good: Starting lineup looks solid.

The Bad: A 4th round pick on that TE? Really?

The Outlook: Looks like they’ll pick up how they finishedlast year – winning a lot.

8. Obese Geese

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 7.0 (2)

Certainly the most divisive team in the preseason voting…theygot 3 1st/2nd place votes, but also 4 last place votes. Which, of course, putsthem somewhere in the middle.

The Good: Balanced, with strength at WR1 and RB1.

The Bad: Untested (though high upside) rookies at WR2 andRB2.

The Outlook: Solid, though may get off to a slow start.

7. The Schmuckernators

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 6.2 (1)

Not too bad, auto-drafter, not too bad. This team has plentyof talent, even if some of that talent will be forced on the bench each weekbecause of duplication.

The Good: Balanced, strong at QB.

The Bad: RB depth is scary bad after Rice. Seriously, thisis frightening stuff.

The Outlook: Looks like a solid team if they can hold theirown at RB.

6. Rostrum Records

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 6.0

Welp, the family ties prove just about inseparable in pollsas in real life. For the number of established veterans, there is a surprisingamount of uncertainty on this team with injuries and new roles to determine.

The Good: The QB position is in great shape.

The Bad: A lot of questions at RB.

The Outlook: Likely to have a weak start but can be expectedto improve over the year.

5. SayHi2YourMother4Me

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 6.0 (1)

One 1st place vote gives the elder brother Miller theslightest of edges in the preseason poll. However, the short-to-mid termoutlook is not so good if certain neck rumors about the elder brother Manningare to be believed.

The Good: Great RBs, quality QBs and TE.

The Bad: That’s a lot of the IND passing offense, especiallywithout Wayne or Clark.

The Outlook: With Manning, great, but it’s looking pretty murkyat the moment.

4. The Dyin' SharkLions

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 5.7

Well, I certainly didn’t rank myself this highly. However,if any of the 2nd year RBs take off this team should be tough to stop.

The Good: Strong veteran QB, WRs.

The Bad: Young, unproven (to put it nicely) RBs.

The Outlook: Could be a rough start to season, but shouldimprove as the season wears on.

3. Bacon Cheeseburgers

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 4.7 (1)

Nicely constructed lineup leaning toward in-their-prime andveteran players. Hard to envision ascenario where this team isn’t near the top all season long.

The Good: Strong QB, WRs.

The Bad: It’s nitpicking, but not much at RB after Petersonand SJax.

The Outlook: Great starting lineup, and almost certain to bestrong out of the gate.

2. A Sheep at the Wheel

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 4.6 (1)

Last year’s champ looks stacked yet again. There’s a ton oftalent on this team.

The Good: Great RBs and TE and deep bench.

The Bad: Worrisome QB situation.

The Outlook: Should finish near the top again this year.

1. Z Power

W-L: 0-0

Last Week: N/a

Average Ballot Position: 3.7 (3)

The solidly consensus #1 out of the gate, the Z’s have puttogether a dangerous squad. Will the Vick pick gamble in the first round payoff with a championship?

The Good: Explosive QB and WRs.

The Bad: Bench is thin.

The Outlook: Might be the best starting lineup in theleague, and should get off to a good start.